A moment for reflection

I'm 20 years old, I mess with my hair when I'm extremely nervous. Bite my lip constantly. I trip over my own feet on a daily basis. I ramble when I am processing events. I am shy and introverted until I get to know you and let you in. Protective of those I love, but tend to be a doormat when it comes to matters of myself.

I am heavily addicted to music, having this constant need of "give me more, more" because I can never get enough. I love movies, and watch wishing my life was like a movie. Alas it isn't though I promise my self to go through my life with purpose. I doodle and must permanently have a pen and paper with me at all times. I adore quotes but love making my own.

I try to be a ray of sunshine for those around me because I'd hate to feed the dark clouds that loom around those I love. I believe the best medicine is a hug. I have one dirty mind that not many get to see. I consider myself socially awkward, young and at time naive. Never have I ever felt the need to intentionally hurt someone, unless it's my siblings but that goes without saying. I mean siblings fighting is not new to history of mankind. All in all I'm a good person.

Yet, none of these I believe amounts into a guy seeing me more than just a friend. I'm cute not beautiful. I've never had a boyfriend and I've never been on a date. I've been kissed, but I still feel as pathetic as Drew Barrymore's character in Never Been Kissed.

Those closest to me tell me to be patient, but patience is not what I lack it is hope.

I've given up in ever having a love life. Is it normal to have given up in love completely at the age of 20? I love myself and the way my life is going, so as long as those are in line I don't have a problem with my love life not being in sync with the rest of my life. Here's to the beginning of my 20s. Who want's to start the best 10 years of their life chained down?

Case of Nostalgia

Recently I've been very nostalgic. Not about my teen years, but about my childhood. I don't know. There's something about the 90's. It's the movies, the shows, the music. Everything then was just awesome.

In the midst of watching reruns of The Nanny and other shows from the best decade ever on Nick, I realized how free and dirty it was. Seriously The Nanny has some dirty jokes in there. Gone are the days where they do it all sneaky, no they have to say sex in every freaking sentence. Yes, I'm referring to The Secret Life of the American Teenager. Gosh that show is a joke. Not only is it so obvious but it's way exaggerated. No, just no. That show doesn't depict life in high school correctly, not many shows do. I just despise that show. It really sucks and needs to stop. I'm pretty sure everyone has slept with everyone. In my opinion, the show is like The Hills but without the thin veil of reality put on it. Nothing like the 90's. I really miss those shows. Cheers to those who remember The Adventures of Pete and Pete, CatDog, Aaah! Real Monster, Boy Meets World, and Dinosaurs. I shall begin my venture on getting these shows on DVD. I will eventually get to see them over and over again until my heart is content. Which will be hard to achieve since I can never get enough of the 90's.

As for the music, I have had some Sugar Ray, Bbmak, classic Green Day, Goo Goo Dolls, Eve 6, and many more on my playlist for days. So chill and easy to jam to.

Me thinks I've got a bad case of nostalgia.